All you Need is Time

Time, sweet time. Oh how I long for more of you...
Every day I think about saving a time for me to get to the computer and write! It seems as though time slips away from me so fast in a 24 hr time period.  I know everyone has a busy life and people everywhere are in demand for more time, I guess that's life.  

My time is spent here at my office, my home. Tending to my girls and house chores keeps me busy enough, I wish I had a little more time to tend to me. I have to interrupt now to get back to work, excuse me.... 

I'm back. Reese needed a nap and I got to shower! ;-) how refreshing.

Ready for bath!

Time. What is time?

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Time is a dimension in which events can be ordered from the past through the present into the future, and also the measure of durations of events and the intervals between them.

My past has come and gone so gracefully, I must say. Looking back in my own chapter book of my life, I am filled with wonderful memories and events I like to turn to in pictures and on pages folded in my book. 

Kerry and me in our front yard

My parents came to dinner the other night and my mom brought me an old silver, antique looking, picture frame. Instantly, when I laid eyes on it, memories from the house I grew up in led my mind to that page in my book.  I remember it and how lovely I always thought it was. It will forever remind me of my mother. Which makes me think of my own memory of her. Her hands soft and delicate, her smell, like fresh baby powder and  pink Oil of Olay facial lotion. She has a distinct smell that holds the smell of my mommy. The smell of warmth and comfort. Every time I see her and hug her that smell brings me to a folded page in my book, of when I was a child.  A page that is folded at the corner for me to always turn to when I hug her, or think of her, or see her picture. 

Home made vegetable soup with a little bit of 
Thanksgiving turkey

I guess that's the amazing thing about our past and how we are able to hold onto things such as smells, that can take us back to that page we have creased to return to. 

In my present, my book is wide open and being illustrated as each second goes by.  My girls are coloring it so bright and full of color and energy. Some pages are calm with cool, serene colors and other pages are bold and outstanding! The pictures are so unique and in depth with tiny details that bring my book to life. 

Reese is 7 months old now. How did that happen? My timeline seems to be written out in bold and a huge font. It is so big and moving so fast. I don't want to jinks it but, I think she is sleeping though the night! :-) She seems in a deeper sleep and she isn't as restless as she used to be a couple weeks ago. I have been putting her to bed earlier and then I give her a bottle before I go to bed, she doesn't seem to fully wake up to eat, but she's up eating and then instantly falls back into her sweet dreams up to the moon. 
If she fusses, I wait outside her door, and she usually stops right away. Or ill go in and pop the Binky in her mouth and she is soothed. 

Maybe since she's older now, she is able to sleep better? Maybe she was going through a growth spurt and wasn't sleeping well because of it. 
What ever it is, I am happy I am getting 5 hrs of straight sleep, but when I think of my baby and how big she's getting, I am crumbled a little inside. She doesn't need me in the middle of the night anymore, she is not waking because she wants her mama. She looks bigger to me too! Her tiny hands still remain tiny but are slowly getting bigger. She's more active, rolling ALL over, working on making the move to crawl. Although I don't think she needs to crawl, she is doing just fine achieving her goals that are within reach.  She is also so proud, another sign of growth that she has developed. She is realizing more and almost seems like she knows  things I don't. She might, being on the ground and her tummy all the time, she is figuring out how to get on with life in this active stage as well as results from cause and effect. She also grins a sweet innocent grin that says 'look at me mommy, look what I can do!'.

Riley is growing and changing too. Each day is a new milestone for her. Since I jinks-ed myself with her outbursts since my post on the rules, she has been acting out the last week. I try to remember what it could be that is causing her to act out, and then I pick each tiny detail apart to try and help her... This job is so important, I need to be here at home for them. Our girls need us, to show them how to get through this hard life. I am so so so grateful I can be the one to be home showing them the ways to life. It is the most rewarding job I have ever worked.... 

Riley wanted to go to this park so she could go on the monkey bars for the first time all by herself. She got out of the car and ran over by herself and monkeyed herself all the way across!

She was so happy! She was so proud of herself. She accomplished something she had been thinking about for a few days. Did it all on her own. She did it consistently until she had no more strength left in her little arms, it was cute to watch. :-D 

      
I have had to be more diligent in my ways and not let anything slide. Being on top of her actions is helping me be on top of my actions, and what it takes to be a respectful human being. It's so crazy how each minute in each day, I have to be a role model, in every situation, because she is watching my every move. I also like to explain with words what I am doing so she can understand not just through my actions. I have to explain things that are going to happen before they happen, like what we are going to do next. Children, not just mine, but all children need to know what's to come ahead, it helps them remain calm and know what to expect so there are no unknowns or sudden changes, which can lead to an out burst of confusion. Like grown ups, children need a routine and schedule to feel on track and aware of what is going to happen. Which leads me to my future.

We took a drive to look at Christmas lights, Riley loved seeing each house and how they were all different, this is going to be a fun tradition. So much wonder and happiness in her big blue eyes.

The unknown, some plans made already on the calendar in my book,  and the rest left to blossom and grow into a new form and shape of memories and pictures on my blank pages. I am excited for holidays that come at the same time every year, the old and new events that come with the changes in season. The new traditions I am going to create with my amazing family. I look forward to watching my girls grow each new second, and to filling up my chapter book with giant aspirations that will be filled and jotted down for my pages to be creased so I can turn back to in time. 

Christmas craft. We collected these spiky balls from the park and made them sparkle with glitter for the sparkly holiday to come.

An afternoon walk turned into a jog.

With our babies :-)

To visit the roosters on the next block

Another exciting thing to come is our family room! It is almost finished! :-) 

I couldn't be more excited to have more space, for us all. We have lived in this house almost 3 years and the amount of time and hard work Marc has put into that wonderful, spacious room is at arms reach of coming to an end! Such a good feeling of something to look forward to, the new room with life to be lived in. We are so lucky to have all the wonderful things we have. A warm, perfect sized home, healthy babies, food, income, warm clothes and love that floats all over this seriously wonderful life. 

Growth

Strength

New seasons and new light

Magical thankfulness

I haven't felt inspired to sit down and write. My body has been so busy and not wanting to sit down. This morning though, I feel like I have things on my mind I would like to get in words. 

Since my post on The Rules, Riley has been a different girl. Something has sparked in her blossoming young mind and she has grown in such a little, but big girl way. She is accepting her role as a big sister more, and we are acknowledging her big role. She knows that she is not a baby and enjoys being a big girl. (Marc and I call her baby, like we call her sweetie or honey, and she has been saying "I'm not a baby". We tell her she will always be our baby and that she's right, she is not a baby anymore). 

She hasn't acted out as much or really at all since then;  some evenings when she is tired (all kids are at the end of the day) she will whine or mope, I let it slide, I remember as a child feeling so tired and when I felt like that, tasks were so hard and seemed too big. I always put myself in her shoes when she acts certain ways. If she is excited, sad, scared, nervous, embarrassed, angry, tired, etc. I try to remember when I was little and how things felt for me in similar situations, or just by reading her emotions. It wasn't that long ago when I was a little girl, I have fresh, wonderful memories of it. 

Happy Birthday Grandpa Buddy and Hannah!

Riley with her cousin Julia at Jillian's 3rd birthday party

I wish the same, happy memories for my girls. My childhood was magical. Each person in my life now and then, has had a huge impact on these magical memories. 

With the holidays coming, many special memories and cozy comforts come to me. This year for Thanksgiving my little family will be making a new memory. Traditionally since I was a little girl, I spent Thanksgiving at my aunt Katie's with my family and foods that will always remind me of Thanksgiving. This year we are not traveling to see my family, we will travel close by to enjoy the company of our dear niece, her amazing parents, Marc's parents, sister and brother. My sister/best friend, Kerry, will be there too, like she always has. Growing up we were always side by side. All of my memories include her. Such an amazing and wonderful gift, to have a sister who is your best friend. She knows me better than I know me. She is my go to person, for everything. 
I am so glad Riley and Reese have each other. The bond of sisters, no matter how many years apart, is very special. They are a form of who you are and share the same family memories. That is like a soul mate, for life. 

I am really lucky to have her and all of my siblings in my life. 
Family gives life such a nice cushion. Knowing they are your people, and that they will be there for you always is so comforting. 

I think this year I am thankful for my family. Nuclear, immediate, extended, and in-laws. All the people who have helped make these lasting memories for me. These memories are huge and have made me into who I am. 

I want to thank my Grandparents; Grandpa Jack, Grandma June, Mamaw and Papaw. All of my memories start with you. The traditions you have started with my parents, have carried on to me as a parent. That is a breathtaking accomplishment and such a special gift. Family values are something I cherish the most. Side note: it also amazes me how certain smells or tastes bring back memories of you, and of people I love. 

I am excited to start and carry on my own family values and memories with my children, most from what I inherited, and new ones that Marc and I will carry on and cherish forever. I wish magical traditions to be carried on to my girls and they too hold a special, special place in their hearts for memories and family. Now that I think about it, I can see these special and magical moments in Riley. She remembers things and certain traditions we hold from holiday's, how unbelievable, I get to relive my childhood through my children!!! :-) 

Riley's art work on our dry wall going up in our family room, it will forever be in our  house

Reese's first time sitting in the shopping cart! Her eyes were this big the entire ride =)

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!! Gobble Gobble...

Park Day

Middletown Park, our favorite. 

Trying to get in as many warm days before the freezing cold blows us away!!!

Riley knows how to pump on the big kid swing, but she enjoys swinging in the baby one too :-), why not?!

Reese loves being outside. She can sit in her car seat/ stroller for a couple hours. She enjoys watching Riley play. I know she wishes she could be doing what she does.

One of the many friends Riley plays with at the park.

Riley loves being a big helper, she is so good at it. She is a mini me for sure. She always says she can't wait for Reese to get bigger, so she can play with her. I am looking forward to that day too, when Reese can play with Riley and do things Riley can do, but I will cherish these baby days forever and hold on to them as slow as time can go.

Early Bird's

Already I feel like my list of things to do is piling up and it is only 7 in the morning. 
None of us slept well last night, not sure why. I spent some time in Riley's bed to try and get her back to sleep, and I am grateful she is not awake yet this morning. Reese woke up at 5am, and as usual went back to sleep around 6. 
As a stay at home mom some of my duties include being up when the kids are up. If I need help from Marc ill ask, but I do not want to disturb his sleep since he has to answer to someone and his job depends on performing well on his duties at work. 
I love being there for my girls when they need me. Of course after 3 or 4 times of the tiny cry or the "mommy, I want you" I am a little bummed that my sleep has been disturbed, which is every night, but some nights the calls are more often.... and over the monitor as I am writing, I hear Riley crying... Ill be back...

She's up, she has school today (Tuesday's and Thursday's). My favorite thing about Riley is when she first wakes up. Her face is still sleepy, with wide open blue eyes, puffy air dried lips, her hair tousled like she had been too a party in her sleep, cheeks rosy, the smell of her sweet little morning breath, warm body, and best part of all, her huge good morning hug.  
I'd have to say my favorite thing about Reese is the same, when she first wakes up after a deep sleep. Reese is warm too with wide open blue eyes, and has the biggest, gummiest smile in the whole wide world. I love how she stretches to the moon and back and has so much to say like shes been places in her dreams and can't wait to tell me about them. And something about a baby's breath, how it does resemble the flower; sweet, innocent and oh so delicate.   

When I sat down to write this morning, I intended to write about a book I just finished. 
But, like my life, I got distracted by one of my early bird's, Riley. 

Until next time...

The Rules

 This weekend we also  had very mild weather. Lucky  us we had sunny day's in the mid 60's! I took advantage of this, because it will probably be our last for the season, but with global warming anythings possible.

We like to walk to the next block and stop to admire the horses. Riley has always had a love for horses since she was little. She just sits and watches them and wonders what they are thinking. 

It's fun to give them names too. My parents live on a horse farm and it is ritual for Grandpa Buddy to visit the  horses with Riley when we arrive; such a one of a kind memory she will hold onto forever. Last night after our walk, we played ball and did cartwheels in the yard. I took many mental photographs and took time to watch Riley run, tumble, fall and get back up and do it again. She is really into gymnastics, and loves to keep trying until she gets satisfaction out of the move she is trying. I love her underlying passion to never give up. She gets that from Marc and I. 

This is the horse farm down the street from our house

sitting, waiting, wishing

Reese seems so much bigger since her six month check up a couple weeks ago. She is more determined, and eager to try everything. She is so proud of herself and the things she can reach for and hold. She examines everything cautiously and with ease. She admires her sister in every way, and Riley always knows how to make her smile, it is the sweetest little thing.  

 Reese wants so bad to be as big as sister to do the amazing things she does. 

 This past week has been a rough time for Riley and her emotions. She has been facing challenges with her own actions and behaviors. It has been so hard to watch her so confused and upset within her own little body.  She has been having a hard time following directions and been getting upset easily.  As her parents, it is our job to help her through these tough times as smoothly as we can.  And let me tell you, it is challenging. It breaks our hearts to see her so upset and angry. But like all human beings, we have all experienced emotions like this at one point in our lives. It is natural to have these feelings, but being able to express them is something that needs to be learned. So, we as parents are the ones who have to teach (and hear!) her the right way to handle her feelings.

 I am sure a lot of her emotions have been because of the new addition to our family and she is not the baby anymore. But I also think it has a lot to do with herself growing older. She is becoming more independent and is able to understand more, which in turn, I do not think she wants to know. She is eager to learn more and can comprehend so much, I think more than most children her age. I think it has become overwhelming for her. I also wonder if Marc and I are to hard on her with rules and following them. But on the other end, if we aren't persistent with them, then she won't learn from them. We do not want her taking advantage of the limits she has, but it is hard to teach her that. So with constant reminder all day long, and good examples, we are showing her it is tough growing up but it is very rewarding too. I always try to keep things "even" between her and Reese, I try to shower them with the same love and affection in front of each other. With Reese needing more attention, I think she is missing that attention. So, as a result of getting attention she is acting out and not listening, which has resulted in "alone time" to calm down and relax in her room. She doesn't like this but in the end she learns that there are certain ways to act around others and which behaviors are allowed and which ones are not. I think she has become grateful for her alone time, once its over.

To put things in her perspective, I explained to her how everyone in this house has rules, not just her. Mommy and Daddy have rules, Reese has rules and Riley has rules. Some are the same and some are different. I explained how following them makes us happy and able to get rewards (or in her terms, special treats, which aren't just food, but privileges too).

I think everyone in this house is learning from her actions. It is teaching us a lot. Patients, persistence, and ongoing love is what we are enforcing in our house right now. It is very hard to keep on track all day, but so far, it is working. She is learning the right ways to grow and she is not giving up, I think she gets that from the both of us; determination and hunger for learning new things. 

All four of us are learning new things as a family and as our own person as we grow into who we are. And I think Marc and I are doing a good job as parents for our girls. And our girls are doing a good job as our children, teaching us what is needed from us as their parents. I love you Riley and Reese.